The Lion Fight

WARNING: EXTREMELY CORNY ENTRY UP AHEAD :)

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As some of you have noticed, I have been absent from the blogging realm for many weeks now. Truth is, a lot has happened since my last post. I simply wasn't ready to write about it just yet- but I'm ready now. So, here it goes...

I FAILED MY FIRST SEMESTER AS A MEDICAL STUDENT.

There, I said it.

I haven’t written in such a long time because I knew that when it came time to write again, I had to admit to myself and to the world that I failed. And so, I’ve dreaded writing this entry for a long time. But before I could write again, I needed time to figure out what went wrong last semester and how I could turn it all around. But most importantly, I needed time to just accept it. So, I took my time and I'm at a place now where I've done a lot of soul searching and finally regained some confidence.

Knowing how difficult it is to share your worst failure with others, friends and even Ross counselors advised to only share this information with people that absolutely NEED to know. But, since day one, I have chosen to chronicle my medical school journey with my family, friends, and thousands of internet strangers. If there is ever anything that needs to be shared, I feel it is this. Future and current Ross students NEED to know about failing at Ross.

So, yes, I failed ONE class by ONE percent. Because of that, I am back in first semester - back at square one as if I had never been here just a few weeks ago. It's taken me a while to accept it and to get to a place where I can feel good about repeating. Truth is, MANY of my fellow classmates scraped by with the minimum passing score in one or more classes and were allowed to move on to second semester. I missed the minimum passing score in Biochemistry by ONE percent.

Turns out, going back to the beginning may have been the best thing for me. I like to think that missing out on that 1% will make me a better doctor. Because I will be responsible for someone's life someday, I'm glad I have the opportunity to go back and learn what I didn't learn the first time. So, this semester I've been picking up all the concepts and details I didn't understand before or didn't have time to digest the first time around. I understand things better and I have a better grasp of the fundamentals of medicine. I've also learned to study more efficiently. But most importantly, I've learned to appreciate medicine and every day, my passion for it grows. I've always believed that nothing in life is worth having if you don't have to work hard for it. My failure has only motivated me to work harder. Failing made me realize how much I want to be a doctor. And let me tell you, you have to want to be a doctor REAL bad to come back to Dominica for four more months (totaling 20 months on the island) and an extra $25,000 in debt!

It'll probably take several entries to catch you all up to where I'm at now.I want to tell you about all the other people that failed. I want to tell you about how we all did on our second Mini 1. I want to write about how and why people fail. I want to share with you how Ross deals with failing students and repeaters. I want to share where I went wrong last semester so others don't make the same mistakes. There is so much to write about...

I am not the first, nor will I be the last person to fail a class at Ross. Unfortunately, failing at Ross is not uncommon. I hope to share my experiences so that those coming to Ross don't repeat my mistakes. And if another student out there has failed or is in danger of failing, I hope my experiences will give them hope and help them gain the confidence they need to continue on their medical journey. I'm not saying I've got it all figured out. I'm just saying "I've been there." I just hope that I'll be able to help others by sharing my experiences and what has helped me the second time around.

Some people find the inspiration they need to keep going by reading their Holy Book or by talking to their friends and family, etc. Me? Grey's Anatomy. I was feeling really hopeless and depressed right after I found out I failed and that I would need to repeat first semester. Then, one night while I was watching an episode of Grey's Anatomy, a scene came up that seemed to hit all the right notes. It was the kick in the butt I needed to get out of my rut and put me in the right mindset to keep working towards my dream. Watch the scene below and you'll see what I mean.


It still gets me every time....

= MY SCAR